Five Minutes With Julia Borcherts

MY BRUSH WITH THE CUBS:

Greg Maddux flirted with me once while he was signing an autograph for my daughter Theresa. But I knew it wasn’t worth pursuing because a) he was already married; and b) I’d read somewhere that his all-time favorite dinner was meat loaf and meat loaf makes me gag.

WHO WERE YOU?:

Probably Mike Harkey. I was usually a high draft pick because my brother and sister were killer athletes, but it was always a mistake to sign me because I never lived up to the perceived potential (I throw like a girl) and I got injured a lot.

WORKING ON:

A short story collection and a novel about a lawyer who discovers she’s HIV positive (and her husband is not) when their infant daughter is diagnosed with AIDS and subsequently dies. I wanted to explore the idea of how a good mother who inadvertently kills her child could work through anger and grief and guilt and get to a point where she feels like she has something to offer the world again. But I’m trying to add some comedic elements into the storyline so that my family and friends will read it.

DAY JOBS:

Freelance writer, adjunct fiction writing instructor at Columbia College Chicago and co-founder and co-host of Dating for Nerds (board game and trivia parties for smart singles).

WRITER I’D HIRE TO MANAGE THE CUBS:

Douglas Adams (R.I.P.), who could create a parallel universe in which the Cubs reign supreme.

THE CUB I’D MOST WANT TO LIVE INDEFINITELY IN MY BASEMENT: Andre Dawson. My daughter lives in Los Angeles now and I’m always looking for ways to lure her back home without sounding too needy.

MOST CHERISHED CUBS MEMORY:

The summer of ’92, my dad was given four tickets to a Cubs game that included a pre-game brunch in the stadium club and he and my mother took my daughter (who was 12 at the time) and me. They had never been to a baseball game before, so we were really excited about introducing them to the wonders of Wrigley Field, but they were more excited about the brunch. While I was in the bathroom, my daughter asked my mother about her attractive-looking orange juice in the fancy glass, so my mother said, ‘here, try it.’ It was actually a mimosa. By the time we went out to our seats, my daughter was complaining of a headache, and by the third inning, she fell asleep in her seat. While she was snoring away, I was yelling at my mom for feeding my daughter booze and she said, ‘you know, if you don’t make a big deal out of it, it won’t be a big deal to her when she’s a teenager.’ I hate to admit it, but my mother was right. And my parents are both gone now, but I think back often to how they made an effort to take an interest in what was important to Theresa and to me. I loved that day.

BEST PIECE OF CUBS MEMORABILIA:

We used to have a Shawon-O-Meter T-shirt, but I have no idea what happened to it.

THE CUBS WILL WIN IT ALL IN 2009 BECAUSE:

Sam Zell will eliminate September and October from the calendar to lure prospective buyers into thinking they’ll get a winning team.

THE CUBS WON’T WIN IT ALL IN 2009 BECAUSE:

Despite Sam Zell’s efforts to also eliminate black cats and billy goats, White Sox fans will secretly offer them sanctuary.

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Want more Julia?

• Read "Women and Children, Also," Donald Evans' profile of her

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